The CHIKUSA Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual
by aya tetsuya
Summary: LOL HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS *YOYO'D* I'M SORRY KAKPI IT HAD TO BE DONE!


Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual to CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO

CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO

YOYO USER/ QUIET FOUR-EYES FROM HELL/ ONE HOT SMEXY VILLIAN

Congratulations on your purchase of an CHIKUSA unit! In order to fully utilize and enjoy your new unit, it is recommended you read and follow the instructions in the manual below.

Technical Specifications

Name: CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO (will also respond to CHIKUSA , FOUR-EYED KAPPA and KAKPI . Can be programmed to respond without any dire consequences to owner to names such as Yoyo idiot , Nappo-chan , chikusa-chan , Smexy sweet cakes and the like)

Age: 14

Height: 177.5cm

Length: If it doesn't please you, you have one hell of a high expectation.

Weight: 62KG

Place of Manufacture: Estraneo Familiga Facility, pom-pom Head Section

Date of Manufacture: October 26th

Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO comes with the following accessories:

Please consult this list in order to know you have been sent all of the following-

Kokuyo Middle High Uniform (x1)

HEGEHOG YOYOS (x1)  
Removal

When your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit arrives, you may find that there will be ward-like looking papers plastered all around the box, and you cannot detect any movement in the box itself at all. This is normal. Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit is waiting to kill you when you open the box. To prevent this from happening, you might want to stay at least 50 meters away or so as not be killed by poisioned needles instantly. After putting the said distance between you and the box, please take a deep breath and shout any of the following:

MUKURO ROKUDO IS HERE!

CHROME DUKURO IS COMING!

THE VONGOLA DECIMO IS IN DANGER!

SAWADA TSUNAYOSHI WANTS TO MAKE A LOVE CONFESSION TO (Insert any male character name from Hitman Reborn-Yes, a male.)!

Or for more humorous purposes:

YOUR MAJESTY, SOMEBODY HAS A WAY COOLER WEAPON THAN YOU!

"KEN IS RUNNING AROUND IN HIS BIRTHDAY SUIT!"

Do not be alarmed if the box is suddenly ripped into tiny little pieces ("Strong cardboard my ass, it can kiss my hegehog yoyos," ) when a burst of needles comes out, after which, you will find CHIKUSA standing in front of you with his yoyos at your throat, demanding ( in a no nonsense tone, no matter which sentence you yelled) an appropriate answer to any of the above sentences. Smile sweetly and show him your proof of purchase (receipt). While he is distracted, slip behind him and knock him out. This should (probably) buy you enough time to program him according to your needs.

Programming

You will find that your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit comes with a large number of functions. Some of these functions are listed below:

Master fighter: He has a AWESOME hairstyle ( we all love him for it ), but you got to admit that it suits him down to a tee. Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO comes with kick-ass yoyos and hand to hand combat skills. In addition, your CHIKUSA unit had learnt the ability to poision people with the as afore mentioned yoyos, which makes him a highly valued fighter. Your CHIKUSA unit comes in especially handy when you accidentally bump into a KEN JOSHIMA unit. However be warned, please do NOT let both units be in each other presence for too long, unless you want to foot a very large bill.

Model: Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit makes an excellent model, especially for yoyo related merchandises endorsement. Of course, with his beautiful physique, you might want to keep him for yourself than to show him to the masses.

Resident prankster: Particularly irked with someone or in the pranking mood? Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit will be an excellent accomplice or mastermind! With his skillful ABILITIES and a head full of ideas, there's no doubt that your victim will suffer the utmost humiliation- all for your viewing pleasure!

Stalker: Armed with excellent illusions abilities and the Estraneo Family's Be sure that your CHIKUSA unit would come back with a mountain of highly valuable blackmail material! Though owners be warned, we cannot guarantee that if the KEN JOSHIMA (Now with CHANNELS!) unit finds out the whole stalking business, you will avoid footing a humungous bill at the end of the day. Oh, and your life too if the CHIKUSA unit decides to tell the KEN JOSHIMA unit about you("I just wanted to see how would he react", the CHIKUSA unit would probably insist).

Boyfriend: Whoever doesn't try this mode is either sane enough not to do it, crazy enough not to do it, or blind enough not to do it. I mean, he's voted as one of the most popular characters under the villains section, wasn't he? Besides, he would look good in a "Kiss me quick, honey" pink apron/ topless/naked/whatever is your preference.

Hairstylist: Need CHIKUSA-like hair but don't know who to turn to? Need to cosplay a certain POM-POM head? No worries! CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO is an excellent hairstylist! He can whip up a similar looking hairstyle like his in mere minutes, and you are bound to steal the limelight!

Singer: Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit is also a great singer! Let yourself be soothed with his smooth and charming voice-you can kiss your insomnia nights goodbye!

Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO comes in the following modes:

Quiet petissimist (default mode 1)

Out for Vengeance/Apathetic Nut (Default mode 2 until he meets a SAWADA TSUNAYOSHI unit and gets his ass kicked by him)

Nostalgic (Locked)

Every fan girl s dream (Locked)

Yaoi/Shounen-ai fan girl s dream (Locked)

OOC (Locked and encrypted with a 64-bit password)

Protective mode (squint and you can see it before he meets a CHROME DUKURO unit, after which it's more obvious)

Quiet petissimist: Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit will stay in his default setting of Quiet petissimist. However, before he meets a CHROME unit, your CHIKUSA unit will stay in his mode for the most of the time. So for everybody's sake, it would be better to buy a "SAWADA TSUNAYOSHI-HOME TUTOR REBORN!" set (also known as: "GOOD-FOR-NOTHING-MEETS-SPARTAN-TRAINER-FROM-HELL" set) together with your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit- while stocks last.

Out for Vengeance: This mode will be one of the default modes for your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit until he meets a GOKUDERA HAYATO unit (sold separately) and gets his butt kicked by the latter.

Nostalgic (Locked): Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO's "Nostalgic" mode only kicks in when he builds a very close relationship/gets his butt kicked by a TSUNAYOSHI unit, by which the TSUNAYOSHI unit starts to blabber something about not killing him and all that life-lessons related stuff, whereby after that he expresses his wish to save your CHIKUSA unit from his prison cell...you get the idea.

Every fan girl's dream: Do I have to explain this?

Yaoi/Shounen-ai's fan girl's dream: After unlocking this mode, your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit will probably be very likely to go after a KEN JOSHIMA or even a ROKUDO MUKURO unit. However owners, please do remember that if your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO is going after a KEN JOSHIMA unit in your vicinity, the both of them are going to be the world's most socially dangerous pairing ever.

OOC Mode: When unlocked (Telephone the helpline for decrypting 64-bit password part)/when he gets overpowered by a MARY-SUE unit, your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO will start to act Out Of Character. The OOC mode is thus dangerous and should not be unlocked unless you need some inspiration to write a good crack story.

Relations with other units

SAWADA TSUNAYOSHI: Their relationship will range from apathetic nut, ready to kill, out for vengeance, and then finally to kind of OK, creepy/spooky stalker, 'friendly' (In CHIKUSA'S standards), way too friendly, implying something, understanding, somewhat agreeable, protector and depending on the situation, 'close in the sort of Boss-Ally way'.

KEN JOSHIMA: Do not let both units within 150 miles radius of each other. Unless you want to be broke for the rest of your life and live on nothing but on a diet of pineapples, pineapples, and more pineapples.

GOKUDERA HAYATO: DO NOT EVER, EVER LEAVE your CHIKUSA alone with this unit, especially if after your CHIKUSA unit had fought and attempted to kill TSUNA. They are now currently operating on a very strained relationship

Cleaning

Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit will never get dirty. Really.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

Question: My CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit had disappeared when a purple bazooka hit him!

Answer: Don t worry, by the looks of it, your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit was hit by a Ten-Years-Later Bazooka owned by the LAMBO unit. Rest assured, your CHIKUSA unit will be back in 5 minutes' time! If he isn't, then I am sorry to say that he has joined the rest of the VONGOLA FAMILY SET in fighting the MILLEFORE FAMILY SET 10 years from now.

Troubleshooting

Problem: Your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO starts to show strong attractions to certain VONGOLA FAMILY GUARDIANS.

Solution: The "Every Yaoi/Shounen-Ai fan girl dreams" mode may be unintentionally unlocked. All you have to do is to relock that mode. However, if that mode isn't on, well, at least there's going to really some wholesome family entertainment, right?

Problem: Instead of getting a Kokuyo High uniform and CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit, your CHIKUSA unit has suddenly grown taller and he is wearing all black with a white singlet and girly looking hat and drinking from a sake bottle.

Answer: You have been accidentally sent a TYL! CHIKUSA unit by mistake. You can keep him or exchange for the younger version.

Conclusion

With the proper care, you will find that your CHIKUSA will be an awesome bodyguard, master illusionist, a great accomplice in playing pranks, a great hairstylist, a great looking boyfriend and a great singer all rolled into one. As he is a certified Bishounen , your CHIKUSA will no doubt attract hoards of fan girls and endless amount of squealing and swooning, so please remember to specify as to who are you leaving the unit to, or else your children will bound to start a cat fight over as to who will inherit your CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit, which will definitely annoy the CHIKUSA KAKIMOTO unit to no end.


End file.
